Preface Blue Eyes in“paradise”

　　IhaveneverlivedinHeaven.

　　Onasummerafternoon,Idecidedtoquitasuperiorjobandacomfortablelifeandgoa

　　oadalone.SomeonemadeupastorythatIwouldgomarryanAmericanguy,soallmyfriendsbelieveditwasanAmericancongressmanthatmademesodesperatelydetermined.Well,frankly,IhadmetaseniorU.S.Representativeandwebecamegoodfriends.ThishandsomegentlemanwasasentimentalloverandIwasobsessedsomuch,ashislove,socialstatusandwealthwereallsoattractive.Wedidspeakdifferentlanguageswithdistinctiveculturalbackgrounds,butstill,Itriedtoloveandbeloved.Weexchangedloveletterstranslatedbymysecretary,andaffectionswerebornfromtheseletters.IstartedtoyearnforastrangeanddistantcountrytheUnitedStatesofAmerica.WhenIgottoHonolulu,asortofgrandatmosphereandsoundreleasedmydream.Love,atthatmoment,wasasthinasawispofnostalgia.Iwasabithesitated,butthatcouldnotpreventmycryingintheheart:Iwastogetmarried!

　　ButwhohadexpectedthatIwastomarryawonderfullandintheparadise?

　　ThelongroadforHeavenwastough,asiftimedidnothavewingsandstepswerenotaccompaniedbyshadows.Withthefeelingofahalfjournalistandaprofessionalwriter,Iwaswanderingaroundintheparadise.Iwouldlovetospeakwithanacademictone,butwhenIexpressedmyfeelings,Iwasactuallyasentimentalpoet.

　　Thisparadisehadneverbeenhardandcold.ImetagroupofgreatAmericansonthewaytoit.Igottoknowtheirfeelingsaboutlife,tryingtotouchupontherootsofAmericans,theirsocietyandculture,sensibilityandsex,religionandfamily,wealthandlove...Allthiswasappealingtomeandtemptingmetogofurther,justlikerocksandsea

　　eezetouchingthelandgradually.Iwasanuntrainedsingerhearingechoesofmysinginginanopenland.WhenIwassteppingcloserandfacingthecountry,IwasprettysurethatIwasinloveindeed.ItmaynotbeimportantthatwhetherIwasclosetotherealparadise,asIsaidinapoem:“WhenIexchangedtimewithHeaven,Ibelongedtothegenuineparadise.”

　　美国人绝不会在破碎中破碎，也不会在虚无中掏空。真实、奔放、热烈——美国人崇尚英雄。

　　IcouldneverwalkoutofAmerica'spassionwhenIwassurroundingbytheromanticocean.Isawthebeautyofasubstantiallife.IwastryingtolookattherootofthesocietyandcultureoftheUnitedStates,includingitshistory,geography,survivalprinciplesandstories.Whenmodernwaysmetoldones,thiscountryplayeditsownmelodyatarhythmreflectingthetruecoloroftheUnitedStates.

　　TheAmericanswouldneverbebeateninthecrash,andnorwouldtheybeemptiedintheruins.TrueAmericanscherishedloveandrespectedheroes,whichcouldbetoldfromtwopopularsouvenirsinNewYorkaftertheterroristattacks:clothesprintedwith“GDNY”andbasketballcaps（Mr.RudolphWGiuliani,themayorofNewYorkCitylikedwearingabasketballcapandworkedatWorldTradeCentergroundzero.Thisrespectedmayorwastorturedbycancer,butstillworkedinthefrontline.）Ihadmanyinteractionswiththecityandthepeople,amongwhichwerepeoplehadworkedintheTradeCenter.Igotthefirst-handmaterialsonunknownstoriesofChinesepeopleintheattack.ButIdidn'ttalkaboutthem.IjustmentionedthatanAmericanreadByronRufusNewton'spoem（1906）loudlyfacingthegroundzeroonthecoastalareas.Iwasdeeplymovedbythefactthatpeopleweresoclosetotheirheartswhenspecialeventscame.xǐυmь.℃òm

　　Americancultureandsocietywere

　　illiant.Theculturemightnotbefineenough,butitwouldneverdisappointyou.Acityhaditsownculture,asalandhaditsownhistory.Butthatcannotbeconsistentwithpeople'schangingmind,thoughitalsokeptchanginginasilentoranexaggeratedway.WhatIwouldliketodowastograspafewfeathersofthoughtsinthedrizzling

　　eezeofAmericanculture.Thecitywasaculturalspace.WhenIwasenjoyingexquisitechurchconcerts,thetraditionalandmodernmusicalsechoedwithafeelingoftouchingambers.InaseniorcommunityIfeltthebeautyofinteractionsbetweenhumanandnatureagainstthebackdropofasunset.Atthemoment,Itendedtobelievethatthesewereallpartsofculture.

　　TheUnitedStateswasactuallyveryweakinsomeway.IfterroriststargetedtheunderseatunnelinthecityofNewYork,thismetropolitancitywouldbeparalyzedovernight.Severalanthraxletterscouldcausegreatpanicinthewholecountry.ThefunctionalauthorityoftheUSgovernmenthasbeenweakeningsincePresidentRegan.Themanagementofprisonsandthesecuritychecksinairportshasbeendelegatedtoprivatecompanies.Butthiswasnotmyfocusofinterest,asafterall,Iwasnotsociologistbutastrangeramongthemovingcrowds.Icouldn'treachverydeeplyinthesoulofthecountry.ButIfoundthatthesocietyandculture,fromtheperspectiveofascholar,couldawakehumanity.

　　Ittouchedtherootsofdesire.Whathappenedinthiscountrymightnotbedefinitelyrightorwrong.Itjuststoodinfrontoftheworldwithadisguiseofphilosophy,andletyoufeelitwithyourheartandwisdom.Sometimesitshowedasenseofhumor（likeacomedy）andmadeyourealizeitsnaturalessence.Youwouldsuddenlyseethefloraandfaunaturningintoabirdparadise.

　　Undoubtedly,itwasatemptationheavenfullofdesire.NewYorkCitywasthemostqualifiedshowcase.YouwouldshrinkintoaparticleofdustsurroundedbyManhattan'sskyscrapers.Youmightbemiredinabjectpovertyinthetreasureisland.YouwouldlookbackuponthePealHarborattackonthedeckoftheCarrierWasp.Youwouldlikelybecomeamediaofdesirebackedwiththehegemonyoftheworld,whichwouldjustpushyoutothelimittoexertyourself.

　　TheUnitedStates,insomeway,wasacountrywhereyoucouldcherishyourdreamsmore.Americanswerestumblingthroughrealityfullofrisks.Itwastheinternalpoweroflifethatmadepeoplequitoryield.Americanmenpreferredlettingyouknowtheirloveandpassiondirectlywithallemotionaldetails.Americanwomenwereabletoexploremanyopportunitiesandaccomplishachievementsundermen'sambitions.Thesociallifeoftheupperclassshowedambitionanddesireinanelegantway,likenotesintonedinaharp.Itwasunlikelythatyoucouldbeuninfluencedornotshocked.Youcouldnotbeexemptfromdesireandambitions.Asfarasthewholecountryisconcerned,theUnitedStatesgrewuptobeahegemonypowerafterWorldWarII.Thecountry'sdevelopmenttoldeverything.Mr.GeorgeKennan,thelaureateofNobelPeacePrize,expressedhisopinionstotheCongressin1948:“Wehaveabout50%oftheworld'swealth,butonly6.3%ofitspopulation...wecannotfailtobetheobjectofenvyandresentment.Ourtask...istodeviseapatternofrelationshipswhichwillpermitustomaintainthispositionofdisparity...weshouldceasetotalkabout...unrealobjectivessuchashumanrights,theraisingoflivingstandards,anddemocratization...”

　　Americans'desirewaspeacefulfire.IthadtheheritageoftheFireGodMauikeinPolynesians'mythstories.Thiscountrywasafairytalecreatedbyitspeople,whichshowedapowerthatwas“throughflowers”(JudyChicago),apowerofwomenandchildreninamen'sworld.

　　Awomanlookingatanation'sculturewouldmostlikelytakeamaternityperspective.IwassearchingforAmericanwomen'sroots,andsuddenlyfoundthatwomenherewereakindofreligion,atruthand

　　illiantpowerbeyondtimeandnation.WhenIgotclosertotheupperclassinthiscountry,Iwasgettingtoknow106-year-oldMrs.SoongMei-ling,widowofChiangKai-shek（latePresidentofKuoMinTang),Mr.KofiAnnan'swife,Mrs.AnnaChenChennault,Mrs.LilyLeeChen,andMrs.Yue-SaiKan.They,ofcourse,couldnotrepresentallAmericanwomen,buttheirlifestorieswereepitomeofwomenlifeinthestates.ThoughAmericanwomenmightnotaskforsomanydetailedthingsasChinesewomendid,theywereworkinghardintakingcareoftheirfamiliesaswell.Theybelievedthatlife,forwomen,wasbeyondpolitical,artandalltangibleforms.Lifehadtheveryidealsubstance.Ipassionatelymentionedalovestorybetweena50-year-oldwomanprofessorandher20-year-oldboyfriend.Imetagreatmother.Shehadlosttwosonsinwarsandgonethroughvarioushardships,butstill,shemanagedtoleada

　　illiantlife.ThereweremanywomenmovementsintheU.S.,butamongvariousprinciplesandtheoriesofwomenrightsprotectioncampaignsandwomen-studygroups,thereweretwomaingenres:thetheoryofessenceandthetheoryofculture.Despite“culturalsedimentation”or“male'straps”,Americanwomen'sstatuscouldalwaysrevealtheircapabilityandaccomplishments.Americanculturegenteellycreatedalevelplayingfieldforwomensothattheywouldhaveopportunitiestoshapetheirownstylesandcultures.Theywereabletoawayfromthebindingofanexternalformoffamilyandrestinafreeworldofhome.

　　《走进美国华裔名人的家》是作者第18部书。新书首发式时，美国第一位华人女市长陈李婉若专程从美国洛杉机飞来广州亲临首发式现场，并参加签售仪式。

　　行走于美国，不仅写了两部书，还拍摄了一部“走进美国华裔名人家”的纪录片，由上海电视台纪实频道播出。被打扰得够呛的这26位美国华裔名人，因采访而相识，因理解而成为朋友。

　　这是作者在美国拍摄的27集专题片。图为宣传海报。

　　TherewerestilltherootsofthesenseoffamilyintheU.S.,butIcouldnotgiveafullexplanationoftheconnotationsofAmerican“family”.FamilywastheoriginofChinesepeople'slife,thestartandendoflifejourney.WheneverweChinesestopped,walkedaway,lefthometown,orrestunderaroof,familywasalwaysinourheart.IntheUnitedStates,thebiggestunstablenesswastheabsolutefreedomthatcouldnotbeboundbybloodrelationshipsandfamilylove.IwasstayingindifferentAmericanfamiliestofeeltheAmericancharacteristicsof“family”,andIcomparedthatwithChineseconceptof“family”inasentimentalway.

　　Peoplewererelyingonfamilyasplantsonland.Americansseldomsaidthattheywouldliketospendtheretiredlifeintheirhometown.So“leavesfallentotheland”haduniquephilosophicalmeaninghere.Fromtheverystarttotheend,thenitwastheotherwayround.“Family”servedasameansaswellasagoal,whichwasprettymuchliketheZen'sthought:virtuallyunified.

　　Mr.BillGates,therichestmanintheworld,has$8.3billionworthofproperty.HehasbasedtheheadquartersofMicrosoftinSeattle,theCEO'shometown.HisattachmenttoSeattleisgreaterthanthattotheInternet.HesaidthatSeattleishishometownandhecouldn'tbeseparatedfromit,asthisplacehasraisedhimwiththewaterinWashingtonLake.Andtherichman'shomeisjustbesidesthelake.

　　美国的欲望是一种平静的火。

　　两个黑人青年去一个华人开的士多店喝冷饮，老板说了一句：“黑也漂亮”。黑人青年回了一句：“黄也来劲”。

　　ManyAmericanseniorpeoplewouldrathermoveoutoftheirhousesandliveinseniorcarecenters.Theymightpassawayinastrangeapartmentpeacefully.IoncestoodinfrontofthetombofGeneralZhangXueliangandhiswife.Itwassuchasimpletombthatcouldevenmakemesad.IcouldneverimaginethatGeneralZhangXueliangwasrestinpeacehereforgood.Noanysenseofpower.Nonoise.Nonothing.TheGeneralhadlefttheworldinatrulysimpleway.ThenIsufferedfrominsomniaforquitealongtimeuntilIdecidedtodosomethingaboutit.IwenttopayacalltoGeneralZhang'ssoninSanFrancisco,andthoughtaboutestablishingaGeneralZhangXueliang'sFundtobuyhisoldhouse.WhenIwasbusyworkingonit,IsuddenlyfoundoutthatGeneralZhanghadnotgotanoldhouseinHawaii,andhehadbeenlivinginaseniorcarecentertilltheendofhislife.PeopleremindedmethathehadbeenverymuchlikeanAmerican.Thiscatholicwasprobablytracingforasimpleandelegantlife.Wasn'titanobleandreservedsensibility?MaybeitwastruethatChinesepeoplewereusedtokeepthingsinside,andwouldnotexpressthedeepfeelingstootherpeopleeasily.ThishadarootinChineselonghistoryandculture.IntheU.S.,makingthingsknownwasawaytoofferingkindnesstopeoplesurroundingyou.Theword“family”inthecontextofAmericanculturewouldbeamixtureofinternalandexternalsensibility.Justlikeasincerepersondidnotneedtotalkaboutintegrityallthetime,anoutspokennationhaditsowncustomofbeingfrank.American“family”wasacombinationofsenseandsensibility.

　　Iwascrazilylookingatandtouchingthiscountrywithaninternalmotivation,asifIweretomarryinaHeavenanddevotemylifetoit.IwasutteringcrazytalksinthegropeforAmericanroots,andgotintoxicatedbydifferentviewsandscenariosontheroadtotheparadise.Sofinally,Iwrotedownmyfeelingsandunderstandingofallthiswithawoman'ssincerewordsofpoem.

　　IlovedthiscountrywhenIwasgettingcloserandclosertoit,andthentriedtoforgetitintears.Thoughunderthewingsofdesire,Ihadforgotmystatusasapassengerandlivedthroughdreamsthatcouldnothavebeenimaginedbefore.

　　WhenIsteppedonthestairsoftheplanebacktoHongKong,IreachedouthandstothatCongressmanstillinlove.Ifeltsogratefulandtoldmyselfintheheart:

　　Youaremypearlandmydirt,

　　Ihavebeenmisledintoagreatfeastonmywaytoamirage,

　　Thetenacityoftheparadisehasbeen

　　oken,

　　Ihavegonethroughthe

　　ightofflowers,

　　Farewell!Thoughitistheleastappropriatetime

　　XiaoyeXiuzi

　　September7th,2005 蓝星，夏国。

　　肿瘤科病房，弥漫着医院独有的消毒水味道。病房是单人间，设施俱全，温馨舒适。

　

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　可对于孑然一身的路遥来讲，却是无人问津的等死之地。

　　他是癌症晚期，靠着意志力撑到现在，但也只是多受几天罪罢了。

　　此刻，路遥躺在病床上，怔怔望着床头柜上的水杯，想喝口水。

　　可他拼尽全力却无法让身体离开病床。剧痛和衰弱，让这原本无比简单的事情成了奢望。

　　这时，一道幸灾乐祸的声音响起：“表哥~你真是狼狈呢。连喝口水都得指望别人施舍。”

　　一位英俊的年轻男子悠闲坐在病床前，翘着二郎腿，眼睛笑成一道缝。

　　“你求求我，我给你喝口水如何？”

　　路遥面无表情，一言不发。自从失去了自理能力，一帮亲戚的嘴脸已经见多了，不差这一个。

　　男子起身，将水杯拿在手里递过来，“表哥别生气，我开玩笑的，你对我这么好，喂你口水还是能办到的。”

　　说完话，他将水杯里的水，缓缓倒在路遥苍白消瘦的脸上。

　　被呛到，路遥无力的咳嗽几声，好在少量的水流过嗓子，让他有了几丝说话的力气：

　

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　“张鑫，为什么？我从未得罪过你。你去星盟国留学，还是我资助的！”

　　张鑫将水杯放下，不紧不慢的说：“谁让你这么古板呢，只是运点感冒药罢了，又不犯法，你非得千方百计的拦着。”

　　路遥脸上闪过一丝了然之色，道：“张鑫你这垃圾，狗改不了吃屎。将感冒药运到国外提炼毒品……咳咳……”

　　张鑫理了下领带，笑道：“你别血口喷人啊，我可是国际知名企业家。这次回国，‘省招商引资局’还打电话欢迎我呢~”

　　路遥叹了口气，现在的自己什么都做不了，索性闭上眼睛不再说话，安静等待死亡的到来。

　　但张鑫却不想让眼前饱受病痛折磨、即将离世的表兄走好。他附身靠近，悄悄说道：琇書蛧

　　“表哥啊~其实呢，我这次回国主要就是见你一面，告诉你一声——你的癌，是我弄出来的~”

　　路遥陡然挣开眼，“你说什么！”

　　张鑫笑眯眯的掏出个铅盒打开，里面是件古怪的三角形饰物，仅有巴掌大小，中间是只眼睛似的图案，一看就很有年代感。

　　“眼熟吧？这是我亲手送你的，货真价实的古董。我在里面掺了点放射性物质，长期接触就会变成你现在这副鬼样子。”

　　路遥马上认出来，这是自己很喜欢的一件古物，天天摆在书桌上，时不时的把玩，没想到却是要人命的东西！

　　他伸出枯枝似的手臂，死死的抓住眼前人的胳膊！“你……”

　　“别激动~表哥，我西装很贵的。”张鑫轻松拿掉路遥的手，小心的捏起铅盒，将放射性饰物塞进他怀里。

　　“我赶飞机，得先走一步。你好好留着这个当做纪念吧，有机会再去你的坟头蹦迪~”

　　说完话，张鑫从容起身离开。临走前，还回头俏皮的眨眨眼。他原本就男生女相，此时的神态动作居然有些娇媚。

　　保镖很有眼力劲，赶紧打开病房门。同时用无线耳麦联络同事，提前发动汽车。

　　~~~~~~~~

　　路遥只能无力的瘫在床上，浑身皆是钻心剜骨般的剧痛，还有无穷悔恨、不甘。

　

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　但很快，剧痛渐渐消失，只剩麻木，路遥隐约听到过世的双亲在喊他。

　　就在路遥的身体越来越飘，即将失去意识时，胸口突然阵阵发烫，将他惊醒。

　　从怀中摸出那三角形饰物，发现这玩意变得滚烫无比，还在缓缓发光！

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